


Zom-B

by astraplain



Series: Kurtoberfest [14]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, Not Blaine or Klaine Friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-08-22 08:57:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8280188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/astraplain/pseuds/astraplain
Summary: “Tell me you did not create a meme about your ex.”





	

“What are you wearing?” Elliott asked, taking off his sunglasses and leaning forward a little to stare at Kurt’s t-shirt. 

“Like it?” Adam asked. His shirt was olive green where Kurt’s was navy blue, but they had the same design. “Kurt and I came up with the idea and Muriel designed it.”

“We made you one too,” Kurt exclaimed, bouncing a little as Adam retrieved the charcoal grey shirt and handed it to Elliott. “It glows in the dark.”

“I’m loving the design,” Elliott said, studying the array of well-preserved green zombies dancing around a bow-tie wearing zombie playing a decrepit piano in a graveyard. Above the picture in horror movie font was the phrase Zom-B. “I still don’t get how that phrase became a thing.”

“It’s all over the fan groups,” Kurt said, wide-eyed and innocent while Adam tried valiantly not to laugh.

“Oh you did not!” Elliott looked equal parts delighted and scandalized. “Tell me you did not create a meme for your ex.”

“Technically, the guy who reviewed his concert started it,” Kurt said primly before Adam lost it completely and burst into laughter. 

“That was classic,” Elliott agreed. He’d enjoyed the writer’s humorous analysis of Blaine’s vocal stylings (sings like a constipated zombie) and the crowd’s bafflingly enthusiastic response. The most rabid admirers had been dubbed zom-Blaines. “Wait. Does that mean you’ve been trolling your ex’s fansites?” Elliott frowned, considering for a moment before declaring, “Why would you do that to yourself?”

“Yeah,” Adam said with a surprising edge to his voice, “Why make a funny anonymous post on a public fan page when it’s so easy to stalk and harass someone and all of their friends on facebook and professional blogs?”

“Is he doing that again? I thought he’d settled down since the tour started.”

“It happens whenever he’s bored.” Kurt waved the matter off lightly but Elliott knew him too well to believe the act. Blaine had a very bad habit of posting online after drinking too much.

“Well, hey. However it started, the name caught on and now a lot of his fans call themselves zom-Bs. We’ll have lots of company wearing shirts like these, even if they don’t get the joke.”

“True,” Adam conceded, his easy humor returning. “Our online store sold out days ago.”

“Wait.” Elliott’s smile turned into a wide grin. “You’re selling Zom-Bs shirts?”

“And hats,” Kurt replied. “Scarves and tote bags”

“Mugs and water bottles,” Adam added.

“Don’t forget the pins,” Kurt reminded him.

“All sold out?” Elliott asked, amazed. 

“Down to the last pin,” Adam confirmed. “There’s a waiting list.”

“We thought the Apples and One Three Hill could use some new equipment,” Kurt said, grinning with devilish delight. “It seemed only fair that Blaine contribute. He’s been selling the ‘my fiance broke my heart and abandoned me’ story in interviews for years.”

“True,” Elliott laughed at the deviousness of his friends. He’d seen enough of the damage Blaine had done through the years to appreciate the elegance of Kurt and Adam’s plan. “That deserves a drink. Want to skip the concert and start early?”

“Sure,” Kurt said easily, stripping off the t-shirt and tossing it aside while Adam did the same. He was about to toss the tickets Blaine’s publicist had sent into the trash when Elliott stopped him.

“Take them along in case there’s anyone in standby.” 

“Good idea,” Kurt agreed. “Build our customer base.”

“Practical, yet terrifying,” Adam proclaimed as he followed them out the door leaving behind the greenish, glowing zom-B’s

 

::end::.


End file.
